Tuesday, 29 April 2014

Sun Salutations

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At this precise moment I'm wishing that the weather would stop teasing us with the beautiful warm sun, then cruelly sending a rain shower to bring us back to reality that it is in fact only April. I'm hoping that with May just around the corner, the sun will warm up just a bit more so that I can practise Pilates or yoga out in the garden without the risk of getting a chill or a soaking. 

Although I'm dreaming of creating a corner in my garden for such purposes, mine isn't actually that private so I'm more than likely going to use my parents, who have a beautifully enclosed and private garden, which also happens to be a sun trap.

It would seem that I've been spending a lot of time on Pinterest 'researching' my perfect garden lately and these are my favourite three...

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Image credit
Image credit

I could see me losing hours in the sun practising and although I won't be getting a space like any of these for a long while, I just need the sun to come out so I can pretend! 


Linking up with IBOT, Random Wednesday

Monday, 28 April 2014

Starting Afresh

By the time you read this, I will probably be struggling to get an over anxious child to school, on what will be her first day back after nearly four weeks off due to illness and Easter holidays.  I am dreading it as Monday mornings are usually stressful enough without the extended absence but at the same time I am more than ready to get some normality and routine back in our lives. 

Today will also see the first day of my new 'normal' week. Due to drastic council budget cuts, my job has been cut to just two mornings per week meaning that I will be mostly at home during the week whilst Megan is at school. I am unsettled and nervous about the financial situation I now see myself in, but on another hand I am relishing the opportunity of having the time to work on other areas of my life that I have been unable to do recently. I have had a few projects in mind for a little while now and I guess this is the perfect opportunity to realise these dreams or to at least see if they are viable. I can't take forever in the planning as realistically I need to get things moving as soon as possible, I have a roof to keep over my head and a daughter to provide for. I am excited at the challenge but I won't lie, I have spent many a restless, sleepless night worrying about everything. I can't say too much more at the moment, but I have a lot of work to do this week to get things off the ground. As the saying goes... today is the first day of the rest of my life! 

I hope you have had a lovely weekend and here's to a productive week ahead!

Linking up with Monday Morning Gossip, IBOT, Random Wednesday

Saturday, 26 April 2014

Relaxing Saturday

As Thursday's post shows, we've had a pretty rough week. Megan stayed with her dad last night though so I had a quiet evening which I think I very much needed. Although I was in bed and exhausted I couldn't switch off and actually sleep, so I started to work on the syllabus for a project I'm working on then watched Nashville on my iPad until 2am.  I've heard about the show via a few American bloggers that I follow and recently decided to give it a go - I love it and can see me catching up with all the episodes very quickly!

Today we are both not feeling right, cold, achey and generally out of sorts so we are spending the afternoon on the sofa in our pjs, candles lit and throws over us. I received this Yankee Lavender Chiffon candle as a gift for my birthday and it's the first of the Pure Radience collection that I've tried. Although I love the usual Yankee jars, I love the sleek look of this candle and it's fragrance is both relaxing and comforting, perfect for today.

Picture souce In UK available from TK Maxx

Megan is about to bake some cupcakes and we are having a sofa dinner of pizza and strawberries and cream, whilst we watch my cousin and her husband presenting the European Speedway GP on Eurosport this evening along with the odd rum and coke (obviously not for Megan!). I hope that you're all having a relaxing and enjoyable weekend aswell.


Thursday, 24 April 2014

Walking on rocky ground...

So, this is exactly how I feel right now. I don't usually mention this too much but this week has been tough. Our local services have been entirely useless over the last couple of years with Megan and have failed to diagnose correctly or provide the help that I desperately need for her. She had been doing so well but a combination of events have lead to a tough time lately. I'm completely drained as she isn't sleeping and her anxiety levels have been sky high so she doesn't want to leave my side, which is thoroughly exhausting. Quite frankly we are at crisis point and although I've made it this far I'm not sure how much further I can go without some support. She would appear to have a rare form of autism which means that there are not many specialists in the country. Local authorities seem reluctant to refer her, instead choosing the pointless exercise of assessing her for more typical forms of autism which she obviously does not fit. I've had to become the expert in the condition to prove to the so-called professionals that the diagnosis and management they are recommending is not appropriate. In fact, it makes the situation worse and it is heartbreaking to not be able to help your daughter lead a 'normal' life. Social situations and interactions are increasingly difficult, to the point where I am worried about taking her places as she cannot interact and needs tight control of every situation to lesson her anxiety. If she does not feel she is in control her behaviour can be come extreme which of course is not acceptable in daily life in the outside world. She has been at home with me for the last three and a half weeks (due to illness and Easter holidays), which has escalated the problem and I'm worried if I take her away this weekend her behaviour will result in long term problems for us. 

I am now scared, not just for her future but also for mine. I know this will sound completely selfish, but I've raised her alone for pretty much the last 12 years and I never could have imagined how tough it would become. It has made relationships so difficult and impacted on my health and to be honest, the thought of spending the rest of my life like this terrifies me. I'm a strong person and have got through so much, but some days are dark and I don't feel so strong. Of course I love her more than anything and will never give up on her, but I need a break. It breaks my heart to hear my daughter say that she never should have been born and I hate her to see me cry but I'm running on empty and do not know where to turn. I'm so grateful to my friend who took her out for an hour or so today. I haven't slept in nights due to her being too anxious to be alone and because I can't switch my head off at night, so to have an hour just to lie down was well needed. This post isn't meant to be whingey or sympathy seeking - I just needed a release. This isn't the best written post, the stress has made my fibromyalgia pain worse and affected the fog that it causes in my mind. It's hard knowing the words are in there but not been able to communicate them but hopefully just getting all this written down will mean I can close a door on feeling like this and wake up tomorrow with some new found strength.


Tuesday, 22 April 2014

Spring Room Pinspiration

Hope you all had a lovely Easter! I enjoyed a lovely long weekend (post to come later this week) but now it's over I'm focused on redecorating my living room / dining space. I actually started just before Christmas, buying soft furnishings and a new side unit, but didn't get around to stripping the walls and re-papering. My new curtains and rug are baby blue and floral as I was looking for a brighter look in my living space. Now it actually is spring there is plenty of inspiration around to finish my room. Aswell as looking for new wallpaper I'm looking for some spring / summer accessories and I can't wait to look around the stores to find new cushions and vases inspired by these pins which are on my 'home' board - link below.

I love having fresh flowers around the house, I think they instantly brighten up a room and make it more homely. I tend to stick to clear glass vases but I'm loving some of the coloured ones in these pins. I'm also thinking a blue birdcage may also become a must! Are you redecorating for spring? Where do you get your inspiration from?
Have a great day.

Linking up with Essentially Jess, Because Shanna Said So

Friday, 4 April 2014

Friday's Fancies - April Showers

Wellies - Joules, Parka - River Island, Umberella - Lulu Guiness 

So it's Friday and what a week it's been! Unforeseen hospital visits, appointments, birthdays and days off school - welcome to the first week of April! With April of course comes the mixed bag of weather (alone with every other month when you live in the UK mind you!), I think this playful  Lulu Guiness umberella though is just the trick to brighten the showery days and you can't go wrong with a pair of Joules wellies. I usually keep a light parka style mac from New Look handy as it is easy to roll away in my bag when the sun is out, but to hand with the unpredictable Welsh weather. I'm thinking of updating it with this navy River Island number though, I love navy and it would tone down the fun accessories.

I'm not feeling too talkative today, it's been a draining week so I've parked myself in bed with lots of pillows, candles, a cup of fruit tea and Sex and the City 2! I'm so rock and roll but tonight is just what I need.

Have a great weekend :) 


Linking up with Friday's Fancies, Friday's fab Favourites 

Tuesday, 1 April 2014

Back to my roots

I took today as a rest day. We had a very busy weekend, including a trip to Paignton Zoo in Devon and an unexpected Monday spent in Bristol Royal Infirmary. Today I was back in Cardiff with a day off work, which meant that after my workout this morning I enjoyed a soak in the bath and relaxing afternoon.

I've spent the last three months with my hair blonde and had been contemplating for the last couple of weeks whether to go back to my natural brunette. I'd decided to make an appointment to make the change but being my ever so impatient self decided to do it myself this afternoon and got dressed and walked to my local chemist to select a colour. 

I'm so glad I did, I've enjoyed being blonder but feel like me again now I'm darker! I'd had some very 
blonde highlights put in so the Natural light brown colour from Clairol that I used has made me brunette with some lovely lighter colours where the brighter blonde streaks were. As a bonus it only cost £5.99 instead of my usual £70 hairdresser costs! 

I love a change but it feels so good to be back to my natural colour. I'd struggled to get my make up right with my complexion and lighter colour and I think it suits me so much better. I shall be bookmarking this post when I get the itch  to mix it up again!

How about you? Do you stick with your natural look? Here's hoping to a more settled week / month ahead. Happy April lovelies.

Linking up with Random Wednesday, IBOT